But I just don't want to!
It began a few nights before the move when he started crying in his sleep and calling out very passionately, "I just don't want to!" over and over again. He wasn't really awake and certainly wasn't anywhere close to rational thinking, so I never figured out what it was that upset him. I just rocked him and repeated that he didn't have to do it and it was OK. It worked that night, but as we wrestle with it in the daylight hours, it can be tricky to know how to respond in a way that honors the developmental stage and also teaches the Lord's correct principles of obedience.
I had an "I just don't want to!" morning this week. I was tired and the morning family routine took it all out of me. When the older four were off to school I climbed back under my covers to hide from the world. It wasn't long before I got a prompting to do something. I could see myself doing it in my mind's eye and felt the accompanying light that I have learned is the Spirit guiding me as to what the Lord wants me to do. I rolled over and hid my head under a pillow--basically saying, "I just don't want to!" I wanted to do nothing--I just wanted to be warm and snuggly. And yet, I also know that I love how things work out when I follow the promptings of the Spirit. It was quite a moment of struggle. It gave me a great appreciation for the wrestle Brett has with obedience sometimes too. I guess I am still working on that developmental stage just as much as he is!
What do you do when you know what is right but you just don't want to do it?
I love this post! Just browsing your blog, because I love your spiritual insights. I find myself feeling this way more than I probably should. It is a struggle to submit to His will when it doesn't seem so demanding at the moment. I find myself rushing my kids to do what I want done right away, and then realizing that I drag my feet even worse than they do, when I have to schedule visiting teaching, study for a lesson, or feel an impression to call a neighbor or volunteer to help at an "inconvenient" time. I eventually get around to most things, but sometimes after the best opportunity passes, and I feel bad about letting it slip by. I am learning to be better about just getting it done, and then the feeling of obligation turns to a feeling of peace and true happiness for having done good. I like that feeling, and need to learn to connect that outcome with the obedience I should show.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing Tandee!!!
ReplyDelete"True things have good feelings" -Ben Behunin