A great model of HOME
I moved out of state to go to college when I was 17. Though I lived in the dorms I found a HOME at my Aunt Linda's and Uncle Vernon's house with a family of cousins I never had had the chance to get to know very well before. Holiday celebrations, Sunday dinner, driving lessons with a stick shift, date nights, and homesickness remedies were there for me whenever I needed it. The first two grandchildren were born in that family my freshman year.
Yesterday we attended the missionary farewell for my Aunt and Uncle. Those two babies are now both away from home as freshman themselves. Much has changed since then, but as we had lunch in their home, as the children ran and played, as we caught up on life with the cousins, it still felt like HOME there. Something about their home just invites everyone in as they are and gives them love (and lots of candy) and laughter and sends them back richer than when they came.
Over the years as Todd and I have tried to establish a home environment for our family, and even as we shopped for homes, we have frequently discussed the magic we both feel in my Aunt and Uncle's home and how we can strive to create that in our own home. On the drive home yesterday we tried to put a finger on what makes the magic.
First and foremost, it's the love in the hearts of my Aunt and Uncle. They are amazing people who truly model unconditional love. Family and HOME is the center of their lives and that is tangible.
Another feature is the desire to gather together. They have hosted more family events and holiday celebrations than I could ever count. They find joy in a full house, and it opens the heart to know that someone wants you (and your rowdy kids!). It is a place where everyone is always welcome and the door is only locked when they are on vacation!
A third aspect is that they really care. As my Aunt and cousin asked about Todd's new job, the new neighborhood, and the impending birth of our little one it was so authentic. They weren't asking as a matter of conversation. They really cared. People and their life experiences are central. Those relationships are genuine, even if it has been a long time since you have been together. It's like you have a place in their hearts as well as a place in their home.
A fourth aspect is that it is a home of abundance. It's almost like needs are provided for before they arise. We laughed as a cousin came in to the family room where we were and opened a giant chest to reveal children's clothes of every size. She quickly located some extra clothing for her nephew who was certain he could not eat in his Sunday clothes. Problem solved. There's also a closet full of pajamas in every size , a drawer full of swimming suits, and a shelf full of diapers in every size. Whatever the need is it can be met with very little effort. There's something about that mentality that is validating of what it is to be human, what it is to be a parent who doesn't always have it together going out the door at home, and what it is to live spontaneously.
A fifth aspect is that the home is extremely functional. It is beautifully decorated and very well cared for, and it is made for family. There isn't a square inch of that house where children can't be or that has to be protected for the sake of decor. I've watched as it has been remodeled and rearranged over the years--both inside and out--and the central feature of those projects has always been to facilitate it being more functional for large groups to gather there. Everything on the walls is central to family--pictures of children and families, wedding pictures, pictures children have painted, family history charts and photos.
There are a hundred other things I'm sure. That HOME wasn't built in a day. They have known their share of struggles and trials of every sort, but in the end that is one of the places--the first place in fact--that I would identify as an amazing model of what it is to be at HOME.
Yesterday we attended the missionary farewell for my Aunt and Uncle. Those two babies are now both away from home as freshman themselves. Much has changed since then, but as we had lunch in their home, as the children ran and played, as we caught up on life with the cousins, it still felt like HOME there. Something about their home just invites everyone in as they are and gives them love (and lots of candy) and laughter and sends them back richer than when they came.
Over the years as Todd and I have tried to establish a home environment for our family, and even as we shopped for homes, we have frequently discussed the magic we both feel in my Aunt and Uncle's home and how we can strive to create that in our own home. On the drive home yesterday we tried to put a finger on what makes the magic.
First and foremost, it's the love in the hearts of my Aunt and Uncle. They are amazing people who truly model unconditional love. Family and HOME is the center of their lives and that is tangible.
Another feature is the desire to gather together. They have hosted more family events and holiday celebrations than I could ever count. They find joy in a full house, and it opens the heart to know that someone wants you (and your rowdy kids!). It is a place where everyone is always welcome and the door is only locked when they are on vacation!
A third aspect is that they really care. As my Aunt and cousin asked about Todd's new job, the new neighborhood, and the impending birth of our little one it was so authentic. They weren't asking as a matter of conversation. They really cared. People and their life experiences are central. Those relationships are genuine, even if it has been a long time since you have been together. It's like you have a place in their hearts as well as a place in their home.
A fourth aspect is that it is a home of abundance. It's almost like needs are provided for before they arise. We laughed as a cousin came in to the family room where we were and opened a giant chest to reveal children's clothes of every size. She quickly located some extra clothing for her nephew who was certain he could not eat in his Sunday clothes. Problem solved. There's also a closet full of pajamas in every size , a drawer full of swimming suits, and a shelf full of diapers in every size. Whatever the need is it can be met with very little effort. There's something about that mentality that is validating of what it is to be human, what it is to be a parent who doesn't always have it together going out the door at home, and what it is to live spontaneously.
A fifth aspect is that the home is extremely functional. It is beautifully decorated and very well cared for, and it is made for family. There isn't a square inch of that house where children can't be or that has to be protected for the sake of decor. I've watched as it has been remodeled and rearranged over the years--both inside and out--and the central feature of those projects has always been to facilitate it being more functional for large groups to gather there. Everything on the walls is central to family--pictures of children and families, wedding pictures, pictures children have painted, family history charts and photos.
There are a hundred other things I'm sure. That HOME wasn't built in a day. They have known their share of struggles and trials of every sort, but in the end that is one of the places--the first place in fact--that I would identify as an amazing model of what it is to be at HOME.
Comments
Post a Comment